Comfort Zone

I've heard it said that once the pain of staying the same becomes greater then the pain it would take you to change, you will do whatever it takes to change.

The below story is adapted from one of the Buddhist Jataka Tales. I don't know the exact name of it but I read about it in the book Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With The Heart of a Buddha by Tara Burch. I've seen this story play out many times before.

In a previous life the Buddha was a good merchant living in a small village in north India. One afternoon, while working in his shop, he saw a beautiful and luminous person walking across the town square. Stunned, he continued to watch. He felt his heart light up in celebration. He had never felt or sensed the divine shining forth with such immanence.

The merchant knew that he wanted to serve this being and give his life to awakening such love in his own heart. With great care he prepared a tray of fruit and tea to offer as nourishment to this being. He stepped out into the sunlit day, moving joyfully toward the luminous being who seemed to stand awaiting him.

When the merchant was halfway across the town square, the daylight turned to darkness. The ground quaked violently and a gash in the earth appeared between him and the one he longed to serve. Lightning bolts ripped through the sky, and he saw the glaring eyes and bloody mouths of horrifying demons. He was surrounded by the voices of Mara: "Go back! Turn around! It's too dangerous, you won't survive!" As crashing thunder shook the air the voices continued to warn, "This way is not for you! Who do you think you are? Go back to your shop, to the life you know."

Terrified, the good merchant was about to turn around and run for safety. But at that moment his heart swelled with a longing so great that his desire for love and freedom was stronger than any voice of warning or doubt. With that, the merchant took a step into the dark chaos...and then another.

The demons disappeared, the light of day returned and the earth came back together.

The merchant, full of joy, found himself standing right in front of the luminous figure and the great being embraced him saying "Well done, bodhisattva, well done. Walk on through all the fears and pain in this life. Walk on following your heart and trusting in the power of awareness. Walk on, one step at a time, and you will know freedom and peace beyond all imagining."

What Is An Angry Entitled Man?

We've addressed other syndromes afflicting certain segments of the male population on this blog in the past as well.

I can't remember or find the exact quote but I've heard it said that certain groups are most oppressed in places where their capability is most feared. Women have made some pretty incredible strides over the past hundred years, so I suppose that it should be no surprise that there is now much backlash against women's choices, opportunities, and achievements. But make no mistake, this is all about control. The Angry Entitled Man Syndrome (AEMS) has reared its fat, ugly, balding, head.

AEMs want society to regress- a return to the "good ol' days" of pre- 1960s America. Society and the economy have changed a lot over the past 50 or 60 years and many have not been able to adjust nor were they prepared to make adjustments- this breeds resentment. Many men are now angry because they no longer understand their place in society and feel that their significance in the world has been attacked; and since they can't CONTROL OTHER MEN they need to feel that they can still control women.

The AEM wants to control: what women do; when, where, and with whom women have sex; who women choose as partners; women's reproductive choices and options; how women choose to live their lives; how much education is appropriate for women; etc. The AEM will use shame, anger, bullying, his fists, or even legislation in an attempt to control women's movements. He feels entitled to do this by virtue of having a penis- because back in 1940, the good ol' days if you will, that was all he needed in order to maintain said control.

I appreciate that many men who feel this way are getting up there in age and will die off soon- perhaps that wasn't very Christian of me to say but, oh well. That does not change the message that they are sending to their sons and grandsons as well as the contingent of men who now view women and their progress as a threat. So as women it is ever important to take a step back and observe the current situation and maintain vigilance. This election is going to be even more important that I originally realized.