People often don't pay enough attention to body language. Body language and non-verbal cues can give you lots of insight into what the other person is thinking but not saying. It can provide you with insight into what type of relationship the other person wants, whether or not they're interested in you, and if they're being less than truthful to you. Here I'll explore all of these situations.
Get Some Background Info
First things first, know a little bit about your man. Find out about his personality and his culture. Some cultures attach different meanings to certain nonverbal cues. For this discussion we'll assume we're talking about an American male.
Be sure to look for patterns of behavior and be conscious of your own body language; as you'll also be giving off clues about your own level of interest.
Take location into consideration as well. The place where you have the encounter may influence body language. A formal event may illicit completely different body language than a public park.
Breaking Down Relationship Levels
So, what does his body language say about the type of relationship he wants?
Friendship: A man interested in friendship will make eye contact, but of limited duration. He will turn towards you sometimes, but not throughout the conversation. He will also be interested in what you have to say, but not overly interested.
The Fling: A man only interested in a fling will get too close too soon. He will come right next to you and invade your personal space. He will keep eye contact too long and may touch you somewhat inappropriately (i.e. stroking your face lightly or playing with your hair). If the man is not respecting your boundaries, he is more likely interested in a fling.
Dating: A man interested in dating will turn towards you during the conversation. He will look into your eyes longer than a friend would but not as long as the guy only interested in a fling. He will have big smiles that show he is generally interested in the conversation and you.
He's Into You: If he digs you he will look directly into your eyes and try and hold your gaze for as long as possible. If he is seated, his legs will be crossed with his foot facing you (this also means that he's turned on by you, by the way). If he touches you frequently while you're in conversation not only is he interested in what you are saying, but he's also very attracted to you!
Decoding Hand Holding
Your man holding your hand is always a good sign but, it is also an indicator of his level of commitment to you.
If he loosely cradles your hand in his and lets you pull it away without any resistance, he's not that emotionally involved. When a man feels close to a woman he tends to weave his fingers within hers. He also reaches for her hand at every opportunity he gets. If your man is doing this, it's a really good sign indicating that he feels very connected with you and isn't afraid to show the world you're his.
Palm-in-Palm Position. Not so good; this likely means that he doesn't want to get too attached and this is probably where your relationship stands as well. He is leaving himself an easy opportunity to pull away. He may have a fear of commitment and/or he could be using you.
He's Not Feeling It
If he is seated with his legs crossed, foot facing away from you this indicates lack of interest. If he is seated with his legs crossed, foot facing some other girl, then he's probably interested in someone else.
If he keeps his arms crossed when you are seated beside each other he's secretly screaming
"I am not into this!"
This guy is emotionally shut off to you. He doesn't want to share his life with you or probably anyone right now.
When a man isn't that interested, you'll see his eyes darting around the room when you are talking. He'll rarely make direct eye contact and if you do, he'll look away quickly. However, some men are easily distracted so if he starts watching television or a passer-by, this doesn't necessarily mean there's no interest. Instead remove him from the situation and see how he responds. Remember you're looking for behavior patterns.
If he keeps diverting his gaze, he is not focused on you or on your relationship. Moreover, if he keeps touching his hair or his face while he's talking he's trying to pull attention away from whatever is currently being discussed- which is a sign of discomfort on his part and he may be lying.
Sorry to end on such a sour note, but I hope these clues are helpful to you. While researching this I definitely noticed some things that could have been applied to my previous relationships. I hope you find this beneficial as well.
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